When you send a LinkedIn request – are you taking the time to create a relationship or simply adding a connection?

Matt’s LinkedIn inbox is full of requests, and most are lamentable as they are forgettable. Sue Grabowski joins us again to discuss the dismal state of “making the pitch.”

Sue and Matt wonder if social media and networking technology has reduced the value – and the effort- of making a good pitch. Especially pitches made through Email and LinkedIn Requests.

Matt believes that the bar is so low right now that any personalization or research will pay off dividends. What would the business world look like if every pitch relied on research and personalization rather than default messages, cheesy LinkedIn pick-up lines or obvious mass connection requests?

Grab a cup of coffee and listen in as Matt and Sue cover the elements of making a great, prepared pitch.

Transcript

Speaker: Welcome to Endless Coffee Cup, a regular discussion of marketing news, culture and media for our Complex Digital Lifestyle. Join Matt Bailey as he engages in conversation to find insights beyond the latest headlines, and deeper understanding for those involved in marketing. Grab a cup of coffee, have a seat. And thanks for joining.

Introduction

Matt: Hello, and welcome again to the Endless Coffee Cup. And hey, I’m excited because Sue’s back with us. Hi Sue!

Sue: Hi, Matt. Thanks for having me back.

Matt: It’s always great to have you back; the door’s open. You know that.

Sue: Thanks, Matt. And I know it’s been a while but I hope to make it more often in 2019.

Matt: I appreciate that I hope to do more podcasts in 2019. So we’re you know, we’re good on that. Sue, I have an idea for a podcast. And we’ve kind of talked about this a little bit.

Getting Lame Pitches

But let me share with you as preparation for this podcast, and email I received. Okay, because I’m a podcaster. All my information is out there, I’m getting pitches for people who want to be on the podcast. And it’s not, I don’t know if it’s from them, or it’s from some PR company. So I got this one. “Let’s connect you with so and so. As a fellow Podcast Producer, I know how it feels to get lame pitches that waste my time. So and so is the founder of this company valued at over $10 million. He’s a business badass, who loves elaborating on scaling influence influencers generating millions and profits through Facebook and YouTube ads, building a massive online brand from nothing. He won’t waste your time.” And then, not long after I get another one; the same format. “Hey, Matt, we have an incredible guest for your show, Endless Coffee Cup.” I say it differently because it’s obviously been copied and pasted. And the font is different and the size is remarkably different. But I’m going to show it to you it’s a visual medium.

Sue: My former boss used to say it’s like in two point Cudi condensed, which is the tiny font. Somebody messed up by copying and pasting, it’s like insert company name here.

Matt: Then next paragraph, “As a fellow podcaster. I know how it feels to get away in pitches. Sometimes I want to bash my head into the keyboard.”

Sue: That sounds so original.

Matt: It does, doesn’t it? Because it’s used again. Actually, in another email that “Hey, Matt, your show is awesome.” And I say awesome in that voice because awesome is written in all caps. “And I am just the guest for you as a fellow podcaster I know how it feels to get lame pitches. Sometimes I want to bash my head into the keyboard.” I have a folder where I keep all of these pitches. It’s called my email favorites folder. It’s examples of wonderfully good or horribly bad emails.

Sue: I’m going to guess that there’s fewer good than horribly bad. If you have a good one, you’ve probably responded to it. And you probably didn’t put it in there. You’re going to give an example, maybe this podcast of a good one. But it’s very easy to spot the bad.

Matt: Oh, it’s incredibly easy. It’s so disingenuous. And overall, especially when there’s a copy paste, an obvious copy paste. It seems like people are working so hard to make a personal introduction. But yet, in doing so it comes off as so disingenuous. And I guess if I were to name this episode, it would be the perfect pitch. How can you make, let’s not even go for perfect. Okay, let’s not set the bar way to high.

Sue: How about an effective…How about a pitch that might land you a response via email. I’m not even saving by getting five of them. But daily, we’re getting barraged. I don’t know how many LinkedIn email. I get not just connections but emails and they just become diluted. And so I think it’s we can provide another keyword, not perfect but…acceptable pitch?

Matt: What is the goal? It is to get a response. Let’s get a response first.

Sue: The goal is at least… even if you got an “I’m not interested”, you will have gotten a response. So I think that that’s the goal of any email to get an email pitch you are doing, even for them to take the time to say I’m not interested.

Matt: You know, that is something I learned. And I keep going back to my sales training back in the day. But that is something I learned. And it was really interesting. When they said a no, if you get a no, that is one of the best things that could happen to you. Because you know, it’s a no. And you don’t have to keep working. You know, they’re not interested move on. And so yes, getting a no is a good answer. Because it shows that someone at least took the time to say no. And LinkedIn is the preprogrammed not interested. We are getting so many robo calls, lame pitches, and spam email; if we do spot a touch of authenticity we’re more likely to open it.

Sue: Although even in that I’m concerned about doing that. Because when I do that, then I for him, I’m sent to another funnel because I said no. And so really what I do is I don’t answer. And that’s what happens to most folks and trying to reach out. So but I think that there is, we are losing the craft of the prepared pitch. Versus throwing literally is throwing it against the wall and hoping it sticks. And there must be I’m sure there’s methodology behind it. And you send it out to x number of people and it and a small percentage respond, and then you work with those small leagues. But most of the people who come to us who are looking to do any kind of pitching are not really going out to the masses, do they have a target audience, they might have a purchase list, they might have groups of people, but they really are trying to make an effective pitch that would get them a response. And if you want to do that, sending a copy and paste version with the unsubscribe button at the bottom is not going to do it.

Don’t Use Deception as a Marketing Tactic!

Matt: Yeah, there’s so many emails that I think trying to have this appearance of being personal, right? Like it’s a break in a conversation, or I’ve got to find this one is exactly what you’re talking about here. It literally made me question my sanity until I saw at the bottom of that. Let me see where is it here? Okay. Subject line says “Please forgive the timing.” Got my attention. “Hi, Matt. Gah. I reached out at Trevor’s request, and then thoroughly dropped the ball and following up. He brought it up again in regard to whether you manage the Google My Business of your clients. If not, please let me know so I can complete his request, albeit late.” Trevor? I never talked to any Trevor. Well, I scroll down and at the end it says unsubscribe from this email. So a bulk email, trying to deceive me into thinking I had a conversation with someone that I didn’t. And literally trying to make a business or make a lead out of deception.

Sue: I think it’s the difference between impersonal and over personal. And in that case, he was trying to be over personal by trying to end it was deception, dropping a name, sticking something in there. But there’s too personal and there’s impersonal. And in either way, it is deceptive. And unfortunately, it’s wastesyour time which is what really pisses people off. Because time is the only thing that’s of value, you know, and so when these things full your box, but if you actually take a moment to read a subject line, and you go in and you find it’s bogus?

Matt: Oh, you’re angry, upset. In being marketers, there’s an extra level of upset-tedness. And I don’t want to be deceived.  Part of it is I have no patience with unprofessionalism, right? If you want to pitch me, you need to step it up, because I’m a marketer. You’re a marketer. If you’re trying to pitch something, you can’t do canned. You can’t do what you’re doing to everybody else. It’s got to be that much better. And what my problem is, I’ve seen that much worse. I’m seeing a complete lack of effort. Other than in trying to be deceptive. Or on the too much information. It blows my mind what people will say in trying to be casual. Like they’re writing you, like a friend.

Sue: Oh yes, like they know you

Matt: Like, we have this relationship. And I’m the one who’s forgotten about it. So let me find this way.

LinkedIn Pick-Up Lines

Sue: Even if somebody reaches out in an email heading or on LinkedIn, like, I got one that says, you know, hey, Sue, please follow up. Or hey, Sue, can we chat a minute? Or it’s a little too conversational for me? And I get a lot of those where it’s, it is there’s some opening line that supposed to make me feel like they know me, but they clearly don’t know me. Or they, they assume some things about me. And it just it particularly LinkedIn, though, just because I connect with you does not mean that I know you.

Matt: That’s interesting. Because LinkedIn is full of people who try to link with as many people as possible, like it’s some kind of game. I don’t understand that. Those are the lions and numbers going on. It’s no better than another social network where you’re getting followers, no better. Now, I will say there’s another level. I use LinkedIn, from a marketing positioning standpoint of people that have taken my courses online. Connect with me on LinkedIn. And I love to know that it gives me an ability and a platform to communicate with them. Where it’s not direct email, it’s more of an indirect but yet, we can find each other. Then there’s also actually getting business from LinkedIn. Developing relationships, working through people. And honestly, that is the most time consuming hard work process to make that happen. It doesn’t happen accidentally. And it doesn’t happen through cheesy LinkedIn lines. And so I lose patience with people trying to turn people trying to like build their business through LinkedIn with these cheesy lines.

Sue: Hey, do you come to this platform often?

Matt: And acting like they know you is the pickup line. I don’t even think of it that way. It’s Tinder for businesses. So right now I have 300 – over 300!- connection requests in LinkedIn.

Sue: You are selective my friend. I mean, I probably less selective than you and that, but I’m beginning to get more because what happens is I get the immediate email in the LinkedIn messaging after I connect, like with someone who is maybe not altruistic motives for connecting and being right.

Matt: I’m very picky. Number one, if they’ve been through my courses, and they say so in the connection request, you’re in. Second thing I’m looking at how many mutual connections do we have? But then who are the mutual connections. Because I have a lot of mutual connections I don’t know that have somehow gotten into the circle. So if I look at the connections, and I see they’re from some other circle…where it’s there, what I would even though they’re my first, I consider them a second, because it’s not a circle that I’m normally in. So that means I just popped up in their recommended somehow. If there are no connections, I hold off. And I go look and see who are they, where are they from? What’s going on? Because I want to know. I used to connect with everybody. And now it’s like, no, this is not what this is for.

Sue: Because I think it when you first started when I think when this platform started and when I first joined, I did feel like it was more selective.  I didn’t get the spam emails. But I just connected with somebody, literally this week. And they’re locals. And there was a lot of mutual connections. I don’t know the person, but I saw so many connections. I said yes. But within minutes, I get an email. And they said thank you for accepting my connection. And I’d like to know, what keeps you awake at night about your business in 2019? So we’re talking about assumption, you think because I hit the connect button that I’m going to share with you my deepest concerns about my business for 2019? Let me know, that would be a no. And I really probably should go back when some of these when I know it was just a ploy to get into my inbox is to delete them afterwards. But it is like, again, you think that you know me, the assumption that you know, me, instead of actually taking the time that person did? No research on me. It was instant, no homework.

Matt: No, no homework at all. So for my business, I consider LinkedIn a primary platform. And that’s why I’m being so… I’m gatekeeping. When I get stuff like this, “Hey, Matt, I just found your profile here on LinkedIn. And I thought we could both benefit by connecting.” How? Who are you? And then I look at her title. “I help digital marketing agency owners save 10 to 30,000 per year.” Oh, so you are going to sell me something. That’s what your title says. And I get to I get so many of these. I hope digital agencies increase their pipeline; deal agencies do this and do that. You don’t even know what I need. Maybe you should ask what I need. Maybe I don’t want more clients. You’re assuming an awful lot.

Sue: If they would even ask a question that was even relevant, you might consider I got a LinkedIn email from someone who it was literally one paragraph, you know, you get this long diatribe, right. But this was a local connection. And said, I’ve been working in enterprise mobility. And I’m trying to help my clients source mobile solutions. And if you go to my website, Desidara.com you know that we use mobile channels for a lot of our web presence? And so he said, I’d like to chat and better understand how I can use does Desidara for these kinds of things? That was it. So either if you would ask me, it was very clear that he had done some homework and knew I was in that mobile space.

Making a Pitch 101: Do Your Homework

Matt: And that unfortunately, that I went to your website, I know what you do. And I even named your business in the request. It’s to the point where the least little bit of effort will distinguish you from everybody else. I mean, the amount of people, “it’s always great to network with others in the agency world. So I thought I would reach out to connect. I know that’s the new default I’d like to add you to my professional network.” And honestly I’d rather get the default, but that’s the thing. Everyone’s saying that now. Everyone’s saying the same thing. So if you take the least little bit of effort, go to my website, look at what I do. See if it’s even relevant. And then make your pitch. It least acknowledging something unique, something different, where you see there might be a benefit to me.

Sue: So you’re saying that it has to be about you?

Matt: Absolutely, I am. If you’re making a pitch, the rule of the pitch is that it’s not about you. It’s not about the services you offer. It’s not about how many people you’ve helped. It’s not about that. It’s what does the prospect need? What are they willing to do to make that problem go away? Or to get that opportunity?

Sue: There’s the sales one on one things, in fact, if you have that many I’s or we’s…

Matt: We used to call it the we we problem. Because you would get an email says we do this and we’ve been in business for 20 years, we’ve helped these people. It’s all about we, not me, not me.

Sue: That’s just sales 101. And I think that we’re losing that because if it is if there’s more we’s, more I’s, then what you can get out of this, you already will lose just out of who we are. That’s just basic human nature, we care about ourselves.

Matt: We’re all self-interested. So primary example, okay, a great pitch. A great pitch that I got the other day. Someone was pitching podcast editing services. And now I do my own editing. I did my own editing. Because even though I was not looking for podcast editing services. The way she pitched, I responded and said, “You are getting my business. Only because this is the best pitch I received all year for my business.”

Sue: So what did you do? By the way, I just picked up the way that she being an individual, not an entity, pitched you. Tell me what she did.

Matt: Number one. She listened to a podcast and specifically told me which podcast. Told me what she liked about it. Trust me, I know I’ve got some issues. Especially the early ones, I listened to some of those and cringe. But right away, she educated herself. Who is this? Where they talk about? Is this someone I even want to work with? And then send the email saying, I listened to this podcast. I really liked it. Here’s why I was interested in it. By the way I do editing. And if you ever need services, let me know. Yes, the time in the least little amount of effort right now can distinguish you. She made an effort in listening to an episode.

Sue: She gave a shit? And that’s what got your attention, and ultimately landed her business. Because she made it about you. She didn’t take that much time but if she’s in that business, she’d better take that time to listen to that.

Matt: Absolutely. I mean, number one, as someone who’s being pitched, it lets me know, okay, they’ve taken the time to listen to me. They’ve taken the time to understand me. And then they use the statement where it lets me know that you actually did listen, you might say you listen. But unless you quote something, or make a point. Now I know you listen. And now I know that you have taken the time to research, to understand. And then craft something very personal, focus towards me. I’m ready to listen, I’m ready to listen. If you haven’t taken a moment to even look at the website, of the company you’re pitching, or the person you’re pitching. If you’re copying, I can’t tell you how many emails because it’s really obvious to know when someone is doing copy, paste, write my name and business name and title. It’s really obvious because it’s so awkwardly written. I know you’re copying pasting, you’re an immediate delete.

Sue: Through such a world of synthetic everything and it doesn’t even have to be a real big word. Someone is actually real, it will stop you. And when you’re looking for that response, even if it would have been a no, she would have been successful.

Matt: Absolutely. So it makes me think of an old movie, where this girl is so disenfranchised by these guys that she has met, that she eventually says if I just meet, so I just want someone who will say bless you when I sneeze, something like that.

Sue: Singles, the movie Singles.

Matt: Because I remember that scene at the end of the movie. She’s in the elevator, she sneezes and he says bless you and then it focuses on the way she looks at him. She’s in love!

Sue: She’s like, oh, you’re the one? Because, yes, because that’s how I feel in any of the pitches that I get for services, or, and I would say this even about, let’s say you’re not like a mass marketer you’re not coming out with. But I have a freelance designer, who was saying, “Hey, do you want, do you need a freelance?” The subject line is where I start. So then on LinkedIn, I was saying to you earlier, LinkedIn doesn’t have a subject line. So you need to give me a compelling reason, from the very first words you put out there. Why I should read any further. If not, I’m going to ignore you. But if it just says possible freelancer, big deal? What if it says like 10 years experience ready to freelance for you, I don’t know something. But they can be a local person. And or it could be somebody who’s just like, you know, I heard about you from so and so adding a personal touch. But again, if they took the extra step, to go to my website, or to read something about me online, and just post something that gets put something in there that says they took a second to investigate this option, this opportunity. I will open it.

Matt: I mean, and that’s the thing, especially with your business, a woman-owned marketing agency that has the success that you had, that’s doing what you’re doing. It wouldn’t be difficult for someone to say, “Hey, I’m a freelancer. I want, I would love to work with you.” Something where, I want to be a part of what’s happening here. I want to experience this. I want to learn.

Fake Authenticity is Fraud

Sue: We changed our name last year. There’s news. It’s like you could reference that. Give me something. I think that part of it is we are getting so many robo emails and so many things that if we do spot a touch of authenticity, we’ll more likely to open it, and again, even if it’s no, you might get clear now and then you would have done your job.

Matt: It goes back to one of our earliest podcasts where we talked about authenticity. Because so many companies were saying we’re striving for authenticity, but in a completely inauthentic way. And I think you were saying that marketing itself isn’t authentic.

Sue: But then you use inauthentic language in an inauthentic mechanism like LinkedIn or any other social network, right. So you’ve got these two levels of lameness. It’s like what’s the three degrees of lameness? What can you do to just add a little touch of I really cared about this outreach to you?

Matt: Or if there is some type of connection name it. It gets to the point where again, now the word becomes almost useless. So, you know, I started looking at these LinkedIn requests. They just start running together.

Sue: I’ll sit here and our phone lines and I’m sitting either your request to connect or in my case, I didn’t go to my request to connect pretty easily but like yes or no, but I have gazillion messages that I never done anything with and you can archive them on your phone, you can delete them on the computer. But it’s just amazing that you’ve got thousands sitting there. You’re a marketer. If you’re trying to pitch something, you can’t do canned. You can’t do what you’re doing to everybody else. It’s got to be better.

What Does “Connect” Mean?

Matt: “I’ve found your profile here on LinkedIn, thought we could benefit by connecting.” “Matt let’s connect.” “Matt, I love connecting with professionals.” “Matt, I love connecting with other industry experts.” Okay.

What is the word Connect? You know, and again, it gets to this. Okay, now there’s levels. There’s this. I have no idea who you are. But we are now connected on LinkedIn. And I don’t know how that changes the universe.

Matt: But from my perspective, wow, we’re connected through some digital ones and zeros format, we are connected. What does it mean? What does it do? Nothing.

Sue: It was just a marketing ploy, it’s not like we’re friends. It means that we’re one click away – a click. Because you know what? My last five post I looked to see who saw them and clicked on them and liked them. And it wasn’t you. So we’re truly not connected. If you didn’t like anything I post.

Sue: But that word, I mean, it’s just getting obliterated. And I was just looking at a dictionary thesaurus. It’s link, unit, relate, tied, join, associates, touch base. What I’m not seeing in this list, which is pretty exhaustive, is friend, you’re not my friend, because you are connected with me. I’m just somehow tied to you. And in this case, you’re tied by an electronic permission. And that’s really is. If you really want to connect with me, which some of these other words are like; integrate, engage, access, touch, combine, brain, hook, you’re going to have to add that personal element, or you’re never going to have a relationship. These are not relationship builders.

Matt: No, no.

Sue: They are really just an entry point. And if all you’re doing is using it as an entry point and leaving it there, that’s all it’s going to stay. If you want to use it, as a way to try to work toward relationship, relationship requires something personal.

Matt: Well, it’s funny. Because now, all this talk about influencer marketing is getting hot. If last year was the year of the influencer… oh boy, we could talk about for days about, are they really influencing anything?

Sue: Influencing means something is changing as a result of their exposure to that person.

How do you Make a Good Pitch?

Matt: Yeah, we’ll get to that. But 10 years ago, I was teaching people that if you’re going to develop links for SEO you need to do marketing. Marketing entails pitching other businesses, other bloggers, other websites to link to you. Which means you have to number one, have something interesting. You don’t have something interesting, no one’s going to link to you. So first of all, have something of value, something that’s interesting. Second of all, identify who would be a good target. Who would be the ideal audience for your interesting-ness? You’ve identified them, go to their blog and actually read it. Now what I mean, don’t just read one article, read three. Look for something that you find interesting. Read three articles. After you read those three articles, again, assess, is this the right person? Are they snarky? Do they find what’s wrong in everything? Are they looking to create problems or get free things by complaining? And so you probably don’t want to work with them. However, if they tend to be relevant to the industry, if they’re hyping other products, does their personality fit?

Sue: Yes, are they actually giving good opinions or reviews, saying I like this, I don’t link that.

Matt: Because what was happening is people were simply looking at subscriber numbers, or visitor numbers of these blogs and saying, Okay, good target. No, look and see, what’s their attitude? What’s their personality like? Then reevaluate? Are they good? Now, when you send that email, tell them, I read this article, and then pick something out of that article that you found particularly personally relevant? Just like the email I got about podcast editing. What was it that struck you? What did you find interesting, and tell them you found it interesting, right, and give an opinion, go out on a limb and give an opinion about it. But I really liked this because it was really relevant how you said it what you did. Because if you do that, if you said, I read this, or this article, or I found this interesting, you’ve immediately got their attention. Nothing else you can say, right will be as interesting and as attention grabbing, is what you say about them and what they wrote. We just want to be recognized for what we’re doing. Right? We’ve all worked hard, a little bit of recognition. A little bit of recognition would be fine. And so when you get that little bit of recognition of someone saying, Hey, I like that. Wow.

Sue: Yes, you know, I was thinking that we were talking about a response or a response of a pause. I mean, ideally, you want the response, yes or no, right? But in as you’re trying to build our relationship or build something that’s actually going to morph into a call or something, you want to do at least pause, and you want them to not pause the angry at you like to turn to earlier about, you know, being angry. Sometimes you want the pause to be? Wait a minute. Yes. And in the sea of sameness, that’s out there right now, your willingness to give a rip, in your willingness to take a minute, it will distinguish you, from everybody else.

Matt: Obviously, distinguish you in the bar so low right now, just going to a company’s about page, right? It should give you something. Look at their blog, even if the last post is from 2016. And get a sense of the personality.

Sue: If you just plain up, straight up Google organization or person they turn to reach, you might find a news article, you might find that they just joined the board, whatever it is where you can find something where, I know you did try to find me.

Matt: You put in the time, you put in the time you made the effort. Sad to say that is the bar. Then after I only tell people okay, go read the blog post, reassess, then start crafting your pitch based on here’s something I found interesting, quote, talk about it specifically, then when you’re going to pitch what you do, pitch it in terms of how it will benefit them.

Sue: Do we need to talk features and benefits? Not what you do. What you do for me and what I gave? That’s a very simple way of features to benefits. I always talk about this with the car scenario, the color of the car, the engine size, leather versus cloth seats, manual versus automatic. Those are all features. The benefits come when you say, that feature, what do I gain from that feature? The problem is that I see a lot in LinkedIn and everything is I do SEO marketing, I do offshore developing white label. I do i do i do i do. Why do I care? I only care if you told me what you’re doing, does for me? Like, how am I going to feel, act, gain anything to this? I mean, that is really, really prevalent right now. And so here’s all the stuff that I do or our company does, I don’t really care what you do. I don’t care.

Matt: It’s a short delete. It may go spam. Because you have not taken number one, taking the time to know who I am, what I need. Number two, to present your business in a way that benefits me. And that gets back if you don’t know who I am, then you don’t know what I’m looking for. And so when we were teaching people this, what we tell people is, put it in position of “your readers might like to see this”. “Your listeners might like to hear this.” Because now if you’re talking in terms of my readers and my listeners, they’re the ones that give me the numbers. They’re the ones that if I don’t make them happy, I don’t have good numbers. So, talk about the readers. Now the only way you’re going to know what the readers like and if you know what if you have read the blog? And if you’ve read the comments. So do your research, what do they want? What are they looking for? What’s the angle? If you don’t know the angle, then you can’t pitch benefits. If you can’t pitch benefits, then who’s going to read it?

Sue: I think that some of this comes down to sales 101.  Apply it to these new digital mechanisms like you forget, toss out your go to any sales training, you would not, you know, you’d find out you’re going to talk about what they need and features benefits stuff. And then it’s like all we have a new, we have a digital way of reaching out to you. So we’re going to blow all that stuff. Yeah, actually has worked for decades, eons and hundreds of years, now I’ve got a new way to reach out to you. I’m going to tell you everything you don’t need to know. And you’re going to click on it.

Matt: This podcast, by the way is brought to you by Teach New Dogs Old New Tricks, available on Amazon. This is what the book is all about. It’s teaching the sales one on one techniques to the new digital marketer. The new digital marketer knows how Facebook works. They know what Instagram, Snapchat, they know how they work. They don’t understand what makes people tick.

Sue: People are still marketing to people, people. When you talk about the pitches, by the way we really didn’t talk about this is pitching people. You’re not pitching an inbox. You’re pitching a person. And you’re right. That is what has been lost, that’s the root of all of this is if you’re trying to craft something differently, because you’re sending it through a different meaning of, it doesn’t matter. The recipient on the other end, put their pants on the same way as you did that morning, you know has a cup of coffee, there’s the same way that you have a cup of coffee. So ignoring that, you are going to be ineffective!

How can you Make Someone Happy?

Matt: And you’re going to laugh when I do this, you know where this goes to. And I’m going to bring this out a blast from the past here. I’m doing a little quick search. Aristotle said that “Happiness is the central purpose of human life and a goal in itself. You want to appeal to a person, appeal to their happiness.”  That’s thousands of years old! That’s it, it’s not new. How will you make me happy? Bring me more clients? How are you going to do that? How’s it going to benefit me? Happiness is the ultimate purpose of human existence. That’s what we’re all trying to find is a little bit of happiness. And every decision we make is going to be based on how would that make me happy? You know, it’s not to get existential, but that really is the question. And when you send me an email, it really kind of brings me down. Now I have to reach up for that delete button. And it’s kind of far away. I got to get rid of that. You’ve just distracted me. You’ve just taken time away from me.

Sue: Can you imagine you’ve applied that filter to nearly every email you said, I don’t mean just the pitch. How is this email going to make me happy? Or and? Or how is this email going to make someone else happy? I’m saying me as the recipient, happy. And I mean, that can be everyday interaction. But definitely on a pitch, you apply that filter…

Matt: I’m going to do that tomorrow. Let’s do that, and then come back and talk about the result of because that’s, that’s powerful.

Sue: It’s not about being cheerful. Again, I guess I want to differentiate that it’s not just about throwing a bunch of BS up there. Because there’s enough of that in those emails to opening lines that are too personal and by the way, here’s my family and whatever, I don’t know you. That doesn’t make me happy.

Matt: That tires me out – it wears me out.

Sue: Because I’m thinking even if just general correspondence with my clients, making them happy, would be have your job is done. Or  we found this out to help you. Or we just thinking in general, and those are all pitches too, because anytime that you’re trying to connect with someone your pitch, but I just think on those pitches, if somebody would have layered in, well, this email makes you happy. It would totally transform what you write.

Matt: A former client that I’ve known for years, and we’ve honestly really more developed into a friendship, than a business relationship. And he sent me certainly other day saying, you know, do you know anyone that could give me an assessment on our eBay store? Yeah. I asked around. And the next day, I was like, you know what? Let’s just go book. And I ended up putting together a, 10 bullet points, do this, no charge, just do this. Just take care of it. And I, I think you’ll see a big difference. And it was kind of a Wow, thank you. You know, I think maybe he was expecting for $2,000. I’ll give you an assessment. It took me 20 minutes to put that together. And it’s someone I have a relationship with, why would I overcharge, overdo, all it needed was 10 bullet points. Here you go. Do these things.

Sue: That make people happy are saving time, saving money? Ease my load, honor my work, recognition, respect what I do, help me be better. You can do that without giving me the laundry list of what you do. You can sum that up pretty fast. And then I can make the decision. And that makes me happy too, we’re empowered to make my own decision when I don’t feel put upon or taxed to respond to you.  Or, one of the emails I received apologized, saying, “If I’ve over communicated, I’m sorry.”

Matt: I think that is guilt! On that point I see so much. So someone has made me happy. I have a series of four emails from the same person spaced out three days exactly in between. And the last one is “if you really don’t want to hear from me,” and yeah, I even have a sponge bob GIF saying, “nobody cares” in there. And at the end, it’s like, “Maybe I should just accept the rejection and stop emailing. Oh, the pain.” Don’t guilt me. No, it doesn’t make me happy.

Sue: I’m telling you. I think I wasn’t even thinking about that with Aristotle, but that some fundamental things, and it goes to your book to that age old about how people operate, which we forget that. And I don’t think we ever really looked at that. In terms of the pitch, we’re talking about the things that we get if we say, if you just would simply remember there’s a human being on the other end of that communication. You might rephrase it, because if you wouldn’t read it, why would they?

Matt: Yeah. It reminds me of years ago, we used to go to these breakfast or lunch groups, with different business people. It’s a club. You know, and there would be people there that, you know, again, you can classify them. They think because they’re showing up, they’re going to get business. But yet, there’s a core group of people who actually get to know each other. Who, they’ve developed relationships over time. And honest, I mean, I loved going to it, because it was a fun group. And I hope that my group within that group was going to be there. Because we had a good time together. And absolutely, if I had business they were getting my referral, for what they did.  Or, if I needed them, they would get it. But there were others that they didn’t enjoy being there. They were just putting in the time. And honestly, their pitch was terrible. Why would I do business with you? And it was because they didn’t give compelling benefits. “This is who we are this is what we do.”

Sue: I just think that that applying one on ones to what you’re doing in your pitches via email even by phone. Like, if you wouldn’t respond to it, you can’t toss it out there. No, but remembering that there are human beings involved here. It is. It’s a very, very big deal. And if you’re making a sincere pitch, sincerity is that that you will give me an ounce of work or effort toward showing me that you’re trying to build something that’s meaningful, not just, I’m not just another lead that you’re trying to capture.

Matt: Do your homework, take a few minutes, it just a few minutes, go to the website, everyone’s got a website. If they don’t have a website…go to their feed. Okay, go look at what they posted on Facebook, or on Twitter, you know, wherever, look and see, what’s the person concerned about? What are they? What are they posting about? You’ll learn about them, and you’ll be able to break that ice on a more personal level. And, again, it can’t be about you if you’re making the pitch. Not at all.   Wow. exhausted. I’m exhausted.

Sue: I think that everybody’s really feeling that because in every space you’re getting just bombarded. Yes. And if you want to slip through, then you’ve got to stand out. If you want to stand out, then you’ve got to put forth the effort.

Matt: Raise the bar, just raise the bar, do some homework, put up the effort, it will be recognized. Yes. Sue, thanks a lot for making the time. I appreciate you getting in here.

Sue: Thank you, Matt! I’ll be back!

Matt: And I’m sure the listeners enjoy having you on board here again as well. We got to do our happiness experiment. To the listener, thanks a lot for tuning in to another episode of endless coffee cup. I hope this has been beneficial to you. Hey, just do a few of the things we talked about. And you might see your introductions get a lot better and maybe even get some responses. So thanks again for tuning in. Be sure to like us on iTunes, or leave a review – that really helps. And we’ll see you next time on Endless Coffee Cup.

Featured Guest:

Sue Grabowski, CEO & Founder, Desidara

LinkedIn: Sue Grabowski | LinkedIn

Twitter: Sue Grabowski | Twitter

Listen to Sue Grabowski on an earlier episode:

Endless Coffee Cup: “Selling Social Media”